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I recently received a well-circulated email with these wonderful words from Maya Angelou's appearance on Oprah, who asked her about growing older. 
 
She said it was 'exciting...'Regarding body changes, she said there were many, occurring every day.....like her breasts. They seem to be in a race to see which will reach her waist, first.
 
Maya Angelou also shared these lessons, which are great reminders for our personal lives as well as how we impact those around us:

'I've learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow.'
 
'I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.'
 
'I've learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you'll miss them when they're gone from your life.'
 
'I've learned that making a 'living' is not the same thing as 'making a life.'
 
'I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance.'
 
'I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw some things back..'
 
 'I've learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision.'
 
 'I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one.'
 
'I've learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone. People love a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back.'
 
'I've learned that I still have a lot to learn..'
 
'I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.'
 
Many of these lessons apply to leadership: 
 
On tangled Christmas tree lights, and people never forgetting how you made them feel:  You can tell a lot about a boss by how they handle the unexpected - Do they take it in stride?  How do they deal with the uncontrollable?  This is when the truth of leadership is revealed.  How does the boss deal with a slide projector not working, travel plans gone awry, a product snafu? Perhaps you know a leader that "screams" in email quite regularly, even to front-line folks.  The emails are usually IN BOLD CAPITAL LETTERS IN BRIGHT RED SO IF YOU DIDN'T FEEL LIKE CRAP BEFORE, YOU SURE DO NOW!!!!   Even if your responses are more restrained, remember that most times these emails get passed around by employees as a coping mechanism to make each other feel better.  The same is true with gossip about how you reacted in a face-to-face meeting or phone call with an employee.  Are you setting an example as a mentor, or are you an example of how not to behave?
 
On making a decision with an open heart:  This is an especially difficult one right now.  After all the data is in, many of us have to make very difficult decisions.  It isn't easy to lay people off, and some companies unwittingly dehumanize the process in order to get through it - just make the cuts and be done.  But the analytical approach is often the most destructive, leading to lower productivity from those left behind.   There are many managers who are inexperienced in dealing with layoffs, or have done it inhumanely before. Don't ever assume your managers know how to conduct this process.  Please be sure they get appropriate training and opportunities to role-play.   Make sure you have a plan before you announce layoffs to the troops - or worse, let them hear about it first in the media - talk about inhumane!  It's amazing that companies still don't learn, still don't properly train for this critical process.  Most executives know that how they treat outgoing employees will be judged by those who stay behind, yet they still botch the process badly through lack of communication and training.
 
On feeling pain versus being a pain:  When you as a leader get bad news, is it obvious to everyone else?  Do employees feel like they have to tiptoe around?  I remember one department head who was going through a divorce.  Because this leader couldn't compartmentalize his personal problems, everyone knew it, every day.  For months his staff felt that he was annoyed when they came by to ask him questions.  Because team members didn't want to approach him, he quickly became out of the loop on the informal grapevine that is the life-blood of most companies.  This caused him to be ineffective.  When I talked to him he had no idea how he was wearing his moods for all to see.  He didn't give it much thought, as he was so self-absorbed with his personal problems.   Once he was aware of it he was able to adjust his behavior and became effective again. 
 
On knowing you still have a lot to learn:  This is the classic jerk boss that doesn't want you to think, they just want you to do.  They don't spend enough time explaining the larger picture so their employees can actively contribute to making their vision even stronger and feel some ownership
 
Of course there are many examples of people who have moved up the ladder without having heeded any of these lessons.  My experience is that these people will eventually top out and be moved along, but it's hell for those employees that have to live with it in the meantime. 
 
Why is it that we all can look at these lessons and think back to having a boss that failed to heed them - but we often don't notice when we ourselves are making them?  How can we become more self-aware?   We'll be investigating this topic very closely, so be sure to sign up for our updates.